Valentine’s Day! Part 2

I hope you all enjoyed Part 1! As you can see we were having a pretty good time.

I’m going to go on a quick diversion for a minute. The Parker was also the site of one of my favorite episodes of television “Valerie Relaxes In Palm Springs”. If you don’t know The Comeback, and especially this episode, watch it now. No seriously, right now. I’ll wait.






Are you done? SO GOOD RIGHT?! In this episode, everyone’s favorite underdog Valerie Cherish (played by my hero Lisa Kudrow) heads to the desert to get away from the stress of her failing TV show (been there, done that). While there, she reconnects with an old acquaintance that recently fought breast cancer (been THERE, DOING that!) and now has a brassier and more frank attitude toward life. Valerie, who’s main character flaw is her need to control everything, is majorly uncomfortable with her friend’s ballsy new outlook. In a touching scene, her friend plainly and poignantly says to Valerie, “You have to stop worrying so much about what people think. You gotta love yourself, warts and all.”

I bring this up for several reasons. 1. I take any chance I get to proselytize about the genius that is The Comeback 2. Even before cancer was a part of my life, this scene challenged and excited me. The marked difference between a woman who gripped tightly to the way people looked at her (who I have been at times) and a woman who let a traumatic experience set her free (who I want to be) was never more clearly illustrated than at that moment. Finally, 3. We were at the exact hotel and location where this scene was shot and coincidentally, I ended up needing this advice a little during our trip.

I have always loved to experiment with fashion. Even as a young kid I had the purple Dr. Martens instead of the black ones. Sure, that meant getting teased a bit for not blending in, but good fashion thrives on a touch of rebellion. However, we all know that no matter how free we want to think we are, there’s a limit to how “out there” we are willing to go. And I reached mine.


I had so much fun dreaming up all these looks for the weekend. Different eras, different wigs, different uses for thing I already had. One of the challenges was finding ways to cover my head enough to shield it from the sun without getting too hot in the process. Then while perusing some stores, I found a lavender 1920’s style bathing suit at TopShop on sale for $20 and I took it as a sign. I was going full bathing beauty! I ordered a vintage bathing cap from an adorable shop on Etsy and couldn’t wait to display the result.

Turns out it’s all fun and games until you actually have to WEAR the bathing cap at the pool in front of 40 or so hot young things. A wave of anxiety hit the back of my neck like a baseball bat. Everyone is looking at me. I probably look stupid. Is everyone wondering who this weirdo is? The thoughts rattled on and on. Then, just in the nick of time, my brain latched on to Valerie Cherish. You have to stop worrying so much about what people think. You gotta love yourself, warts and all. Tumor and all. Baldness and all. Bathing cap and all. This is what cancer and this blog is teaching me. Change is mightily uncomfortable sometimes but if you can allow yourself to stop caring so much, you can actually have a ton of fun. My shoulders melted back down to their original position and I dove into the cool water with renewed gusto.


bathing cap

cap and pool



My new found ability to embrace my look came in handy on our next pool trip. I wanted the feeling of a 70’s era yacht princess. Lots of gold and lots of skin. Luckily, skin is something I have even more of these days! It was time to step out with some baldness. I actually found this much easier both practically and emotionally than I expected. It was cool and comfortable and I owned it. I loaded up on the sunscreen but also added the hat to be extra careful. Side note: this suit is from Target which is my favorite place for suit shopping. They have a year round selection and their stuff is as cute as it is cheap. The body bracelet is Forever 21 and I am totally obsessed with it.


pool closeup



For my last outfit I wanted to give in to my surroundings. Everything is so 60’s on the grounds of the hotel. The vibe is like a trippier Brady Bunch: indoor fire pits, wicker chair swings suspended from the ceiling, bright oranges and pinks everywhere. So I attempted my best Marcia. I kept the hat from before and added the long wig which had been waiting for its public debut. For the face, I drew a wing tip with my eyeliner, glued on some lashes and used a matte lip for that hippie touch.

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I already owned this daisy romper but hadn’t busted it out yet. I’m so glad I waited! It perfectly completed my love child look.

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Once dinner was over it was sadly time to pack up everything and go home. Our skin was a little tanner and my head was a little higher. I had unleashed a hidden femme fatale and quieted some demons. Sometimes a weekend in the desert is exactly what you need to get your head on straight. Just ask Valerie Cherish.


All photos by Peter!

Color correction and editing: Adam Deen.

21 thoughts on “Valentine’s Day! Part 2

  1. A quote, a cliche, and a question:

    The quote: “Be yourself, because everybody else is taken.”

    The cliche (of sorts): Kimo’s Hawaiian Rule #5: “Goals are deceptive – the unaimed arrow never misses.” In your context, you are exploring, not necessarily by choice to be sure, new regions of your universe. Bravo for letting your spirit take you where it wants to go. Enjoy the ride as much as you can and the artifices will continue to disintegrate, the only way you can get to amazing.

    The question: Did your MD not put draconian restrictions on sunbathing while in the chemo cycle? My Dad, call him George-Hamilton-Lite, had a hard time with the restrictions (good thing he was at his home in NJ and not mine in FL) Oncology Dude put on him…

    How hard is it going through life making everything you wear look awesome?

    1. Kudos to You for your Bravery, Courage and Enthusiastic Embracement of Life in the light of all you are facing.
      I understand it well, I also had breast cancer and am now 3/4 of the way through my chemo. Both the chemo
      and the cancer have taught me so much. Perhaps you will understand when I say that it has been such a gift, a challenge, but a gift nonetheless. A new way of looking at life, my life, all life and at my fears, helping to dissolve them.

      I also wanted to tell you about a fabulous book, it is written by a Naturopathic Doctor, Sat Dharam Kaur, she is an expert on Breast Health and Breast Cancer.
      It is called “The Complete Natural Medicine Guide to Breast Cancer: A Practical Manual for Understanding Prevention and Care”. It has helped me so much and given me invaluable methods to help lesson side effects and keep my body as healthy as possible during this journey. I believe it, along with meditation has also help me to work full time during my chemo. Maybe it can be of service to you too.
      I too wondered about the sun, knowing that chemo makes your skin much more sensitive to the sun’s rays?

      Blessings to you on Your Journey!

  2. Krysta ~ You are so beautiful & so inspiring. You gave my daughter a boost when she needed it most. Our thoughts & prayers are with you. You are amazing!

  3. You are awesome!!!!! Love you for mentioning “the comeback”, one of the best shows ever. Keep on keeping on! My thoughts and prayers are with you!

  4. I feel like a broken record on social media, but you look absolutely stunning with long hair. I love all the wigs you’re managing to pull off with elegance, but the long haired one is such a fun contrast from your normal look. Anyway, I was wondering if you might be able to tell us where some of your rings are from? I’ve noticed a few that you always seem to be wearing and am wondering where to look for similar ones.
    Glad your Valentine’s Day weekend was so much fun! Can’t wait to read what comes next <3

  5. So jealous! (Did I just say that? Okay, not jealous of the yucky cancer thing… but I’d sure like to drink from that lemonade you’re making! Thanks for sharing these sips with us. It’s so refreshing and invigorating.) You go girl!

  6. I love that you found that episode with the advice you needed to latch onto before you even needed it … and that you got to be in the right place to remind yourself of that advice when you needed it most. This has happened to me so many times in my own journey. It’s wonderful, isn’t it, when we realize how well everything in our lives ties together? <3

  7. Hi,

    I was trolling on the Internet for ideas for my sister Bernadette who was just diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma and I found this blog. (I was searching for ideas on how to keep your beauty in the face of cancer.)

    Thank you so much for the heartfelt thoughts and open revealing accounts of your story. I pray that your treatment will be successful. I look forward to seeing your story/blog in the coming months.

  8. So gorg! Your beyond beautiful, brave and a inspiration. I’m routing for you, your gonna kick this asshole breast cancers ass. Btw I’m totally hooked on your blog.

  9. So inspiring and beautiful Krysta. I went through my breast cancer surgery this week and your stunning blog helped get me through. My thoughts and prayers are with you and looking forward to hearing more about your journey.

  10. You know, Krysta, I think it’s impossible for you to not look fabulous–no matter which decade and style you choose to channel. Bald is temporary; your beauty inside and out are eternal. Sending you a huge hug.

  11. It was not quite the news I was expecting to see via FoxNews and let me just say virtually nothing surprises me in the news anymore. So as I sit and process, so many things run through my head namely lamenting that technology had not developed a way yet to give virtual hugs. Unfortunately you are stuck with my lame verbiage.
    I am reminded of how we walk past people every day and yet have no concept of the hidden battle they face. It takes bravery to allow others in like you are. And in your vulnerability and realness, you have never been more beautiful to me.
    So Krysta, as you begin a journey of conquering new territory know this: you are not alone. And after spending time reading the comments on this blog it is quite possible you have stumbled upon a greater sense of purpose than you might have considered. As you prepare to slay those giants you spoke of, never forget you are fearfully and wonderfully made by a Creator who loves you. For it is in these times He does His greatest work.
    Thank you K for allowing us a peak into this journey as long as you are able to do so. You are in my prayers daily. xox 2 Cor 12:9,10

  12. I think people were looking at you at the pool because they can’t believe there is this goddess in their midst. You are an inspiration!

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